It’s been a few years since I set goals for the year. After getting cancer the second time, in 2010, I unconsciously tied the value of my life to the success of TeamWILD. All of the goals I set centered on TeamWILD. I became completely focused on TeamWILD, to the harm of the rest of my wellbeing. When it became clear to me that TeamWILD wasn’t doing well and we would need to close, and
, I had over the years, invested nearly all of my savings and retirement in TeamWILD and thus lost all of that, a big part of me felt my life wasn’t worth anything anymore.
I now understand that I suffered from a bad case of PTSD from that second cancer experience, aggravated by the trauma I survived as a child. I don’t suffer from massive depression, and for that I am thankful. Nonetheless, I did give up. And I took action to end my life. The gods decided that it wasn’t my time, and miraculously, I survived. I did spend nearly five days in a coma, and I suffered and still suffer from brain damage. Luckily, because I meditate nearly every day, and because I know the power of visualization and practice visualization, I have retrained my brain. And every day I can tell that my neurological pathways are finding new ways for my brain to work.
In addition, because of what happened, I have made significant changes in my relationships with many people. Most of all, I have learned to listen deeply to myself and to the wisdom within. I take much better care of myself. I am calmer and more centered than I have ever been. There are days when I feel lonely and lost, and I have learned to breathe into that and to remind myself that lonely and lost are real, and they are illusions.
And I am now committed to living. More than I ever have been. I have realized that I am unraveling generations of dysfunction. It is worth it to hang in here and do the work that my soul signed up to do during this lifetime.
This year, 2015, I will turn 50. And to celebrate this milestone, I decided to set 7 goals. Seven is a magical number, and I have always believed in magic. I know that all seven of my goals can be achieved. Each month I will take steps toward these goals. Slowly and surely I will make my way, and the joy is the journey.
I’ve realized the Universe, or God, or the Great Spirit, wants all of us to succeed. Once I set these goals and sent them out, beautiful, surprising things started to happen!!! Connections opened up, phone calls happened, energy shifted.
May 2015 be a year of blessings and love for all of us!!
I can help with goal #7. Want to be friends? 😉
Manisha!!!
I am so glad we’ve met and managed to hang out a few times even!!! You are one awesome gal!!
Yes indeed, let’s be friends!
Mari
Mari,
Diabetes, breast cancer and business losses are the fuel that help us achieve our dreams. We hurt so we try harder. We seek so we leave behind our doubts. We grow so we can attain a more meaningful existence. Only the courageous hurt, seek and grow. You are one of the most courageous women I know. Never give up, brave fighter!
Alex,
Thank you so much for your amazing support and kind words! I count you as one of my favorite inspirations of all time!!!
Thank you for all you do!
Mari
Beautifully expressed, Mari, and I know that some of these thoughts are just a preview of your book and the wisdom you have to share. Hope 2015 turns out to be everything you’re hoping for:-)
Laddie,
Very perceptive of you!!! I’m practicing this deep truth telling, which I am doing in my book. I finally figured out that has been the block to me getting this book done sooner!! Thanks for the vote of confidence on 2015!! Thus far, it’s off to a remarkable start!!
Mari
Mari, you are an awesome woman! Never doubt it! Never forget it! I am proud to know you. Life is a journey. Unfortunately, you had some hard lessons to learn. Keeping your spirit positive will help bring positive results back to you. It’s one of the Laws of the Universe. Wishing you a Happy, Healthy and Successful New Year!
Your friend forever, Bev
Dr. Bev,
Thanks so much for your incredibly kind and supportive words!! You are an amazing and insightful woman! Thank you for all the great work you do in the world!
Blessings always,
Mari
Mari,
Thank you so much for sharing. I really look to you as a mentor and guide and am so glad you are finding peace, happiness and meaning. You have a big support network pulling for you and pushing you to be the best Mari! I have no doubt you’ll conquer your list 🙂
Alanna,
You are so very welcome! I felt ready to speak my truth!! I am profoundly grateful for the network of love that is around me and really, around all of us!!!
Blessings to you as we welcome 2015!!
Mari
Great goals! I wish you great achievements!!!
Andreas,
Your photography inspires me daily!!! And best to you in 2015 as well!!! Augsburg College says hello!!!
Mari
I know good things will happen for you Mari. You are determined to make things happen and you have done marvelous things for so many. Keep on doing what your doing, you are such an inspiration to many.
Marianne,
Thanks for your kind words!! I greatly appreciate them!
Best to you in 2015!!!
Mari