Why Is Asking for Help SO Hard?

Yesterday was Friday and Fridays are Blue Fridays, to commemorate the endlessness of diabetes. It also happens to be about -5 degrees Fahrenheit here in Minneapolis, Minnesota where I live. This week has been rather intense. Namely, I had to ask for help. To cap it off, I put on my long underwear and at 6:30am, I took my dear dog Echo out for a walk. I had an envelope in my hand to put in the U.S. mailbox that is two blocks from my house. Echo doesn’t care one bit about the weather as his main goal in life is to run, run, run! He was happy to go bolting down the sidewalk in absolute blissful joy!

I mailed my discounted membership to AAA. Never before have I wanted a membership to AAA like I did this past week.

On Tuesday, I was at a local organization called Prepare+Prosper. I was opening a new checking account. Prepare+Prosper helps low-income people with free tax preparation and they teach people about how to successfully manage their finances. I participated in their Money Mentor program and I was so successful and learned so much that they asked me to come back and become a Money Mentor coach and small group facilitator. In my small group, I learned about this cool checking program that has no minimum and no fees! Sign me up!

I left the organization to go out to my car and big bummer. My car would not start! Terrible and awful. I tried a few times to see if it would start. Basically my panic started to rise and rise. I kept thinking of my goals and resolutions and they did not help me. At this moment the rubber was hitting the highway.

I found I was trapped in my head, not wanting to ask for help. The help I could think of was only from men. I tried to think of what man I could call for assistance. My brother? An ex-boyfriend? A cycling friend? I noticed my twirling thoughts and stepped back from them. I said to myself, “Women know what to do when cars don’t start.” I then called my friend Linda. She was able to talk me off the ledge. I asked her to ask me questions. She did that!

After our chat, I gathered my courage and went back into the Prepare+Prosper office. Lo and behold, three women were in the main office and they listened to my dilemma. Two of them had ideas about how to try jump-starting my car. I had jumper cables. One of the women, who happens to be 8 months pregnant, she offered to come outside and let me use her car to try the jump-start! We bundled up and went outside. It turned out her car was parked right next to mine!

And thank the gods and goddesses, the jump-start worked!!! My car immediately started up! We hugged goodbye and I drove home, the long way so my car would be running longer, giving it a chance to fully charge up.

Then, two days later, I parked on a street that was at a slight hill, when I went to a meeting. As my luck would have it, that particular street was on a snow emergency route and while I was in the meeting was the moment that street was to be plowed. Yup, I got a ticket and worse yet, I got snowed in. I couldn’t drive my car out of the snow. Once again, awful. My friend Linda on Tuesday had strongly suggested I purchase a AAA membership. On Wednesday, I got an offer in the mail to join AAA at a discounted rate.

I tried pushing my car myself. No luck. Finally, since I was fairly near my brother’s office, I texted my brother to ask for help. No one was out on the street. No answer from my brother. I again tried shoveling the snow with my hands, grateful for my warm gloves. Suddenly, I saw a man walking down the street, about to turn and go into one of the houses. I ran over to him and asked if he would help me.

He did! And with a few pushes, we got my car out! Me and my snow emergency ticket drove back home and I filled out the application for AAA.

I learned a few things this week.

  • First, women DO know how to do things, even things related to cars.
  • Second, it IS okay to ask for help.
  • Third, signing up for AAA in a state like Minnesota is SMART!

Thanks for reading this blog! Have you ever been in a similar situation? I’d love to hear about it!

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